moved to http://leongcarmen.tumblr.com/

however blogspot wont be deleted.

i might post something someday.

who knows. ;)

tumblr is addictive.

the author right now is NOT the author.

Hi. Carmen like to send virtual hugs ALOT. In case you do not know what is a virtual hug. It means hug through msn/fb/text/bbm. For example : ''see you soon! *hugs* ''. Most of the time, she doesn't mean it. She sent the text just to make you feel better. Probably because you suck. No just kidding. Or maybe you do. *GASP* Whatever the case is, if you are not a girl, I doubt she will hug you. She also have the habit of calling her friends, hun or dear. Annnnnd you are right! She doesn't mean it if you are guy. Well, except you are her boy for real of course.

the monster under your bed.

I love it when you put your hands on my back when you kiss me. It's the most magical experience. I love it when you just stare at me when we're talking. I love how I can trust you with my world. I love how you have always look after me, you've stood up for me, you always listen and understand even when I know I sound stupid. I love how you can tell just by the way I talk to you, how I am. I love how I love you. Your the only person who truly knows me. I cant wait until I see you tomorrow. Your my amazing

“A guy and a girl can be just friends, but at one point or another, they will fall for each other…Maybe temporarily, maybe at the wrong time, maybe too late, or maybe forever.''

James Morrison - You Give Me Something

"This could be nothing, but I'm willing to give it a try." - Struck me. Even though some things seem so impossible, we still have CHANCES to continue those challenges till the end and see what happens. We always tend to see the "crust" of everything that hides the "substance." As a result, we make early judgments, and therefore, it somehow abates our hope and drive to achieve what we want.

We can't make things perfect, yet we're given innumerable chances to makes things right. :)

What if the ghost of your great grandpa haunted your bedroom at night?

What if I choose to stay along with you and hope you will change, will thing gets better?

What if sweat smelled like cotton candy?

What if there is no goggle translator, will I still understand what those bitches wrote about me in Facebook?

What if you stand outside your house and looked straight up for at least a year or so- would you appear on Google Earth?

What if I never cry when you hurt me, will I miss you like right now?

What if you never treat me special from others, will I fall in love with you?

You get the idea.

What if there were no what if questions, will you make the same decision?

''What ifs'' never exist, whoever combine this two words in the early centuries is a moron.

We have to go through all the goods and bads in life, but whoever go through all of it with you and see the ugly side of you, is the one. And with that person, no matter how bad thing turns out to be, it will be better and easier.

For some reason, for us university students, Parents never come into the picture when problem occurs. Friends does. At least, friends will be the first to know then parents.

I had no idea what I am ranting about because I have not sleep for 18hours. Weird sleeping hours I have.

Anyway as I was saying, stop wondering about ''what if'', make a goddamn decision and live with it, the consequences.

Bai! :D

I think I have post something similar, just a couple months back. Well, what can i say, history is repeating. But um, let me.

You know how when you were a little kid and you believed in fairy tales, that fantasy of what your life would be, white dress, prince charming who would carry you away to a castle on a hill. You would lie in bed at night and close your eyes and you had complete and utter faith. Santa Claus, the Tooth Fairy, Prince Charming, they were so close you could taste them, but eventually you grow up, one day you open your eyes and the fairy tale disappears. Most people turn to the things and people they can trust. But the thing is its hard to let go of that fairy tale entirely cause almost everyone has that smallest bit of hope, of faith, that one day they will open their eyes and it will come true. Maybe it will never be a silver Armour Prince Charming with a white horse riding in speed towards your room. Maybe it is just someone like Shrek. Or if you are lucky enough, just a normal dude running with a shinning sword. In my case my friend, a puny dude. He doesn't own a castle or a white horse. He comes with a pony and his aluminium foil.

At the end of the day faith is a funny thing. It turns up when you don't really expect it. It's like one day you realize that the fairy tale may be slightly different than you dreamed. The castle, well, it may not be a castle. And it's not so important happy ever after, just that its happy right now. See once in a while, once in a blue moon, people will surprise you , and once in a while people may even take your breath away.

When I was in primary, I studied in a Co-ed Mandarin School, Yuk Choy. I remembered there was an mid age teacher who taught English told me, '' Good things happen under the bright full moon.'' Yes, I can proudly announce and conclude, it really does.

This time when the music ends, I cried a little, not as much as I used, not as pathetic as I used too. I was determined. I still am. Actually. In fact, I should be this determine the last time. Oh well..

I am not regret. At least I enjoyed the music.

Maybe one day baby, we will do this.

We lie in bed together, on top of the covers, clothes on, flipping through television channels, ordering food from room service we will finish eating in the morning, after we wake, bleary, uncertain of the city, uncertain of the beige pink walls, the cold marble floor, how we’ve moved to hold each other in our sleep. We are not these incantations written on message boards, names attached to more meaning than stone. We are people, as difficult and as holy as everyone else

Perfect Weekend

I adore the smell of the rain. Especially when its on a Sunday morning. You feel so cold and you just want to cuddle yourself under your blanket. For a moment it feels like all your worries and problems are all gone.

Then when it's time to get back to reality, you called your best friend.

The both of you sit in a car. And you drive. Long drive. Heading no where. And what you and your best friend does is just talk. You talk about life. Catching up after months in uni.

For a few hours you keep driving and you found out small secrets about your friend.

In the end, you drive to a place where the both of you used to have supper. Order the same food.

Trust me, you are gonna like that feeling. :)

I hate the thought of guys watching porn

I know almost or all guys knows how a girl’s body is, but that isn’t a bit comforting. That makes me feel insecured and self conscious. I feel like they fantasize about how a girl’s body should be.Sometimes, guys have that thought that pretty girls don't fart or poo or burp. They think those barbie are so perfect. With no photoshop-ed whatsoever. Those porn chicks willing to pose in various disgusting figures and guys expect most girls out there to do the same too. First of all, not all girl are into tasting your cum. Girls in reality, or at least most girls I know want their sex life to be called as making love instead of having sex. We love a long and easy and passionate session with the man we love. Not by just plainly fuck and there you go honey. We love long hugs and cuddles after when its all done.

All or most girls that are on these porn sites, have big boobs; I don’t have that voluptuous body like those girls.It makes me feel like I’m not enough in my own skin, and I should just hide under layers of clothes. Then again, why would I want to be with a guy who wants big boobs and a big butt? If physical attributes are the only reason a guy comes onto me, that’s ridiculous. I don’t want a relationship or anything to be base solely on physical attraction.

Plus, porn is down right degrading on girls. The way girl presents themselves are sickening and if its what guys want. Then, fuck yourself guys.

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